I just needed to write a quick update about Alfie....he is getting better! Meghan phoned me yesterday to say that he was laughing and walking. It is such wonderful news - our little man obviously just needed some time.

I can't wait to get back to give him a huge cuddle!

Ernest is also now out of hospital and doing a lot better which is a relief.

Being away from the Baby Home does not stop me worrying about all the children - but my volunteers have been giving me updates - thank you guys!

Despite missing all our babies at Forever Angels - it is wonderful to see my own little girl again. She is the happiest, funniest and most determined littlke girl I know - and is truly adorable.

We now have Solar Power at the Baby Home! We are SO excited about this!!

Well, I think I would describe today as being exhausting and bitter sweet.

The 'sweet' part is that our little man - Alfie - is back home with us at the Baby Home. It is SUCH a relief not to have to be at the hospital any more for a while - these last 12 days have been totally exhausting for Meghan and I and of coutse for Alfie too. We are delighted to have him home with us.

The 'bitter' part is that we are not sure quite how much of 'Alfie' has really come home? He is certainly not the same happy, energetic, loving and charasmatic little boy he was just 13 days ago?

We are hoping that he is just exhausted and that his anti-seizure medication is making him drowsy - but it has been 12 days now and Alfie is just not himself. At all.

He is no longer able to speak, chew, sit for more than a few minutes, stand up or walk, and he does not respond to anything or anyone.
He very occasionally smiles but it does not seem to be in response to anything specific?

When I asked the Doctors if Alfie was permemantly brain damaged, or if he would slowly get back to normal - they used the words 'Miralces happen' and 'Never say never where the brain is concerned'.....I was hoping for more of a guarentee that my little boy would be fine in a few days but I guess no one can make those sorts of promises?

Both Meghan and I shed tears as we drove Alfie home from the hospital - and again when we gave the staff some training on how to care for him and what to do if he has a seizure. It was like we were bringing home a new child? It was never meant to be this way?

Only time will tell how much of 'Alfie' we will get back. It is a very hard thing to come to terms with and something I had never even contemplated as a possibility this time last week.

I guess no one knows what is in store for them in life and none of us can predict what our lives, or the lives of those we care for, will turn out like?

What I do know - is that IF Alfie is able to get better - he will. Because I, Meghan, my Volunteers and Staff will do everything we possibly can to get our little boy back to his old self again.

I do need to say a few thank yous. A HUGE thank you to one of my staff - Selina - who has worked night shifts at the hospital with Alfie for 12 days straight - you are fabulous!

Also of course to Meghan who has spent the best part of every single day with Alfie in hospital. Meghan has kept me sane these last few days and I honestly do not know what I would have done without her. Thank you so much Mehgan!

I also need to say a HUGE thank you to Rob and Liz Peck (a Doctor and Nurse friend of mine here in Mwanza) who I truly believe saved Alfie's life last week. Without them - I do not know how we would all have got through this. Rob - I am sorry for all the text messages and questions I kept firing at you and I am SO greatful for your compassion, knowledge and honesty. Thank you so much.

And one final thank you to EVERYONE (Past Volunteers, Future Volunteers, Volunteers Mum's and Friends and Neighbours, Doctors, Nurses, Neurologists....the list goes on) Thank you to each and every one of you who emailed, called or sent text messages to try to help us to diagnose and treat Alfie. We REALLY appreciate it. I am sorry but I will not be able to email you all individually to thank you as I honestly have over 100 emails with advise and kind words about Alfie....and if I have free time in the next few weeks - it will be spent with Alfie, not emailing.
But THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH from the bottom of my heart.

It is only in an emergency when you truly realise the 'limitations' of living somewhere like Tanzania and it is an exceptionally hard lesson to learn that a life may not be 'saved' because of a lack of money or equipment or expertise or often, even, a lack of sense of urgency.

I love Mwanza. I love Tanzania. I love Africa. But at times like these I wish that our Western Hospitals and Education could be used more to save the lives of desperate people out here.
I do not think I will ever condone a complaint about the NHS again!

I would just like to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who has sent me emails / text messages and phone calls to try to help to diagnose Alfie. It is amazing how much people truly care and want to help.
Thank you all SO much. It has really humbled me in a very hard week.

Alfie had a slightly better day today. This morning he slept the entire morning with me, but this afternoon, he was more alert, laughing and even doing 'High 5's' with Meghan! This evening again, he was not responding and very drowsy.

I am hoping that what Meghan saw this afternoon is what is to come and some parts of Alfie are coming back to us?

The majority of people who replied to my 'Diagnosis Plea' made me feel happy that the treatment Alfie is getting is correct. He is being treated for Malaria and Meningitis and is on Triple Therepy Antibiotics. The one common factor from people who contacted me about Alfie was that his symptoms DO fit with a parasite infection. I printed off all the information given to me and took it to the Doctors who are going to read it tonight and make a decision tomorrow.

They did decide to take Alfie off his Phenobarbitone as they think this may be the reason why he is so unresponsive and not 'getting better'. So I am hoping he does not have any more seizures through the night.

Again - thank you SO much to everyone for your suggestions and research. We really appreciate this.

On a good note - Immakulata and baby Jasmine came home today and Immakulata was a VERY happy young lady!

Well Alfie is still fighting hard. He has not had any seizures today and is eating well so these are both good signs. He is however very unresponsive. He does not recognise anyone, is not able to speak anymore and does not really have control over his limbs? Maybe because he is on high doses of anti-seizure medication......but maybe because his seizures have caused some brain damage? Only time will tell.

We still have no diagnosis but I am starting to think it is a parasite / worm which has infected his brain. I am going to catch all the Doctors on the main ward round tomorrow and try to get some more tests done. It has been a week now and he is very sick and we are no closer to a diagnosis.

THANK YOU to everyone who reponded to my plea with email / text message diagnoses - I REALLY appreciate it and most people seem to agree with me and think it is a parasite of some sort. I will follow this lead with the Doctors tomorrow.

Imma and Jasmine should be discharged tomorrow - they are both looking very well today and Imma is a very happy Mum.

Ernest has taken his malaria medication and seems to be doing a little better today.

There seems to be a bug going round the Baby Home as a few of the children and volunteers have got D&V and are generally feeling ill. It is he last thing we need right now as daily hospital stays with Alfie are totally exhausting and we are working round the clock as it is.

We have added new photos to all the children's pages on our website and added a (long overdue!) updated comment on them all.......have a read to find out what our little angels are like now.

Just a quick update ....and some advice needed today as I am exhausted:

Immakulata's baby Jasmine is doing very well.

Immakulata still has high blood pressure (as she wasn't given her medication !) so will not be allowed home until it reduces. She is not at all happy about this but at least she is able to rest in hospital.

Ernest is sick today. He has no fever but was vomiting. I did a Malaria test and it was positive (despite ALL Doctors telling me Malaria HAS to come with fever - in Mwanza this is no longer the case!) We have put him on Malaria medication but is vomiting too much so he may well need Malaria injections tomorrow poor thing.

Alfie went down hill again today. He is still on the ward but he was convulsing for 2 hours during the night and just slept all day today. He is definately in pain though we are not sure where. No one seems to have a diagnosis for him and it is not looking good - so for anyone who knows someone medical out there - I'd love some guesses as that's all Doctors here seem to be able to do.....

Symptoms:
19 month old male -

Day 1) Slight chest infection and no appetite and a rash on hands and feet (looked like lots of mosquito bites.

Day 2) Mass seizures. No fever, no vomiting, no diaoreah. Hospitalised and given Phenobarbitone. Tested for Malaria - negative. Tested for Meningitis (Lumbar puncture) - Negative.

Day 3) - 7) Some fever, vomiting (but usually after medication and seizures), recurrent seizures, lethargy, pain. CT scan showed a small heamotoma on the righ frontal side of brain. We do not have Alfie's history but they tell us it may be about 12 months old....why would this cause seizures now?

Day 7) 'Creeping' rash (looks like small worms under his skin which is itchy) on his legs, arms, tummy.


So far we have diagnoses of: Benign brain tumour, Cerebral Malaria, Meningitis, Brain absess, Epilepsy......but no one knows and he isn't getting better.

Medical opinions to amy@foreverangels.org please - to save our little boy.

Well it has been a LONG and hard couple of days and I am exhausted - physically and emotionally.

Firstly - Alfie is very sick in Bugando Intensive Care. He was quite lethargic on Saturday and did not eat any food and seemed a bit chesty. We started him on antibiotics but he had no fever and no other symptoms.
On Sunday morning he had a seizure (but still no fever) so I took him to hospital. Of course Easter Sunday means no Doctors, no labs, no pharmacy, no drugs....I could go on.

Eventually we got him on oxygen and I drove round crazily to find any pharmacy open which sold drugs to stop the seizures. He was very sick but seemed to get more calm throughout the day and night.

This morning Alfie began to seize again and the Doctor got very worried so he was transferred to Bugando Intensive Care Unit. He has been seizing on and off throughout the day but is now having the best possible care you can get in Mwanza.

We still have no diagnosis but they are thinking Meningitis, Cerebal Malaria or some sort of growth/heaomorrage in the brain causing his seizures? Sometimes I get so confused with all this 'guess work' Doctors do? To me, Medicine is a Science....and yet it always seems to boil down to a serious of guesses? This isn't to negate what Doctors do - I LOVE Doctors on days like today - it just never seems to be this way on TV?

They did a Lumbar Puncture on Alfie today but of course the Labs were closed (being a Bank Holiday!) so we have to wait for tomorrow to get those results.

Thank you to my Doctor Friend - Rob Peck who came to help Alfie on his family day off - I REALLY appreciate it and only felt calm once you had seen and treated our little boy. Thank you.

Meghan and I have been with him in ICU all day (well - between there and labour ward - see below!) and he is now in a critical but stable condition. He looks so small and weak covered in tubes and an oxygen mask but we have to believe he will pull through this and be ok.
I will keep you posted.

Meanwhile - inbetween caring for Alfie this morning - and transferring him, unconcious to the main Government Hospital - Immakulata (our Bethany girl who is 38 weeks pregnant) got sick. She had severe headache, vomiting and then her waters broke! Meghan dashed home to get her and brought her to hospital. She was not in a good way, with very high blood pressure.

She collapsed on the hospital floor before we got her to labour ward and then she also began to have a seizure! Thankfully, my OBGYN friend Beatrice (Thank you SO much!) came to our rescue. She also came from home on her day off (I pulled a lot of favours today!) and gave Immakulata an Emergency Ceaserean Section. At around 3pm today, Immakulata gave birth to a healthy baby girl weighing 3kg.

The baby is on Premature Unit being monitored as it was a difficult delivery but she seems fine. Immakulata is now on the Ward but she is still coming round from her surgery (they had to intubate her as she could not stop vomiting and was very delerious). She still has high blood pressure but she seems to be stable. She has yet to see her baby girl but hopefully they will be together tomorrow morning.

There is a LOT more drama involved in today's events - a LOT of swearing from me, as well as cows, crumbled impassable roads, pure incompetence, a new orphan baby which a nurse handed to me......and a whole heap more - but I can't even begin to go into it right now!

If I was a drinker - I would need a very big drink this evening. But I am not, so chocolate will suffice. I will be back in ICU tomorrow morning with Alfie.

Please keep Alfie, Immakulata and her new baby in your thoughts and prayers this evening.

I thought I would share this photo of Yunisi with you in her new Preschool class at Bethany Orphanage.
Yunisi was our first child at Forever Angels and she 'graduated' to Bethany Orphanage last year. Yuni is surrounded by friends and people who love her and is a very happy little girl.

It put a big smile on my face to see her in this photo looking so grown up.



We also have great news about one of our other 'Leavers'. Bruno was not with us for very long before he was transferred to Starehe Children's Home - but I am very happy to report that he is now attending the International School and is doing very well indeed! He is in the same class as my little girl Tia - so I see him often and am so happy to know that he has a great chance at a good future because of this wonderful education.

All is well at the Baby Home - I would like to make a public thank you to all our Staff and Volunteers who do such an amazing job day in day out with our children and do not always get the thanks they deserve. Thank you all for loving our children and giving them happy and love filled days.
I would also like to say a HUGE thank you to Allie, our Preschool Teacher, who took on the role with a lot of reservation initially but who has been doing an AMAZING job and the kids love her and are learning so much.....and also to Meghan who knows I adore her but I should tell everyone else too! Meghan keeps me sane each day! She works ridiculously hard and is the most enthusiastic, lively and positive person I have ever met. She is not just my Manager - she is a wonderful friend and I just thought I would tell you all.....thank you 'Meggie'.....

Ernest has been at Forever Angels for about 6 weeks now. When he first came - I was told he was 2 years old and even that shocked me as he weighed only 6.3kg.



Ernest's mother died and his Grandmother was unable to take care of him. When I first met Ernest, he brought tears to my eyes. He was so malnourished and frail that you could feel every rib through his tiny body....it hurt just to touch him.

After a few hours we realised that malnourishment was not his only issue - Ernest also has severe Scholosis - curvature of the spine. It is very severe and although he is able to sit up - he can not hold his head straight and is unable to straighten his legs at all.

Ernest hated me when he first arrived! He cried every time I even looked at him or went into the same room. Most of the children become attached very quickly - but this little boy was a hard nut to crack! I have tried every day to 'befriend' this little boy - but he was having none of it!! Finally, this week - he is giving me 'High Fives' every time he sees me and we are all getting smiles and laughter and he has even started to talk!

I since learned that he is in fact 3 and a half years old (not just turned 2!)- so utterly tiny for his age - but a very bright little boy who knows what he wants!

I do not even know how to go about doing anything for Ernest medically - but there is no surgery here in Tanzania that can help him so I guess we will have to look for a surgeon/hospital willing to help him overseas?

Ernest is a beautiful little boy and finally we all get to see his smile every single day!

Well it has been another busy week and I apologise for the lack of diary entries and emails but we have had no internet connection due to SEVERE heavy rains! The roads in Bwiru are virtually disintegrating into nothing and craters are apprearing all over them. Driving has now become an extremely bumpy experience!

I will start with my own good news....my daughter Molly (she used to be Vera or Mia at the Baby Home) was finally legally adopted on Thursday! She has been with us since she was 3 months old and she turns 3 years in a couple of months so it has been a LONG process - but I am thrilled to say that she is now legally a Hathaway! Molly of course has NO idea what adoption means or why everyone was so happy - but she did enjoy the lollipops she received in court to try to keep her quiet!

It has been raining so hard this week - the children are going a bit crazy due to being 'indoors' all day and we are having a nappy nightmare! Even though we have a large roof space - the rains have been so bad that the air is so moist and it has been impossible to wash and dry nappies in time! Thankfully today was a sunny day and there were literally hundreds of nappies hanging on the washing lines to dry!

This week Lilian and Josephine started their Assistant Manager training and they have been AMAZING! They have picked up their new job roles SO well and we are very happy and think we definately made the right decision choosing these ladies.
I would like to make a public thank you to Meghan - my Assistant Manager for doing all of their training with them - she is SO patient and helpful and is teaching them brilliantly. Thank you Meghan - you are a star and I couldn't do without you - and I hope you know that this means as my friend as well as my Manager.....

Joseph and Mwita have settled into life at Tumaini very well. We have not been to visit them yet as we feel it will be too soon for them and they need to settle properly and think of this as their home before they see anyone from their 'old life'. I have been in touch with Beth who is Managing Tumaini and she says they are both doing really well - making friends and happy which we are thrilled to hear.

Tuliza is very soon going to be adopted into a new family which we are also happy about. Her new Mum is a Tanzanian lady who lives quite far away, so unfortunately she has only seen Tuliza once and Tuliza has no idea who this lady is. I REALLY hope that she agrees to stay in Mwanza for a few days so that they can get to know eachother but Social Welfare do not seem to value this 'attachment time' in any way. Tuliza knows she is going to have a new Mummy but she is not sure what to make of it all yet. I hope it will not be a traumatic goodbye and I know that she will soon adjust to her new life and be happy - but I have a feeling this is going to be a very hard transition for Tuliza.

I think that is all the major news this week....I will post this now before the rains come again and my power goes off!